‘Law of Attraction’ floated by Government as solution for energy crisis

 ‘Law of Attraction’ floated by Government as solution for energy crisis

It worked for Jim Carrey. It worked for Arnold Schwarzenegger. But could it work for fourteen million people planning to go without heating this winter?

The government’s latest strategy could call upon Britain’s poorest to ‘visualise being warm’ during the lead up to Christmas.

Speaking for the Tory-Labour think tank ‘Think Warm’, astral-heatologist Penelope Clearwater claims that tapping into the very thing that made the celebrities we love and cherish infinitely wealthy — and as such very warm — may well be the only way to combat rising fuel prices this winter.

“Jim Carrey post-dated a cheque to himself for 10-million dollars for acting services rendered — and it worked. Arnold Schwarzenegger visualised being the Terminator from a very young age — and it worked. So we believe if Britain’s poorest tried really hard to think of a warm home — it will work”.

Penelope Clearwater from the ‘Think Warm’ think tank believes people should just ‘think warm’ this winter.

While exiting Prime Minister Boris Johnson is yet to action any plans suggested by the ‘Think Your Way to Warmth’ movement, he has according to senior aids discretely commented on the fact that Britons need to do more for themselves during the economic crisis, and imagining a warm beach might inspire the country through the energy crisis.

Though unconfirmed, the ‘Think Warm’ campaign may have cross-party support, with Labour Leader Keir Starmer wanting to avoid any ‘heated debates’ at this point, but ‘wholeheartedly believes that the Labour Party could inspire the country back to warmth’ during the colder months.

Mr. Johnson is set to meet with Clearwater in the coming weeks after his three week soiree in the Bahamas comes to an end.

More to follow.

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